Before I came to know Christ, I grew up in a belief that goodness and kindness are for those who are only good and kind to me. But the moment you became my enemy, I could ignore and even forget you. I would show you that you don’t deserve anything from me. I lost friends because of my arrogance.
This was an attitude that I showed to my father. My father before often verbally abused my mother and also my siblings. He is also spent most of his time gambling, blaming us when he lost. I constantly thought he just built a family to do things for himself. I didn’t want to show goodness and kindness to him because I believe he didn’t deserve it. He acted selfish, proud, and mean, bragging his lifestyle to us is as if we owed it to him. There were times that we fought bitterly and I really disrespected him. If something bad happened to him, I thought to myself that he deserved every bit of that unfortunate experience.
I was not a sacrificial person. I didn’t care for others. Instead, I wanted others to show kindness and goodness to me because I felt like I was more important than everyone else. If they needed help, I gave a lot of reasons to avoid and leave them. My idea of being good and kind was being in agreement with my friends to their bad ideas and evil acts. I helped them in cheating and cursing just to be in good terms with them. If I had to do something good or kind to others, it is for my benefit only and not to be a blessing to others. I became a consumer and user of others. It led me into a life of selfishness, anger, loneliness and complacency that absolutely didn’t care for others. I personally avoided other people’s life problems because I had my own to solve. Indifference made my life lonely and meaningless. Sa madali pong salita, mapakasarili po ako at salbahe dati. Wala akong pakialam sa ibang tao hangga’t may magagawa silang kabutihan para sa akin.
But God is really good because of what He did for me through Jesus Christ. I deserve wrath and destruction because of my sins. But, Jesus Christ gave Himself for me, that I can taste and see His goodness and kindness. His perfect work on the cross and His grace made me good and kind.
Now I am continuously building my relationship with my father. God is continuously teaching me to be gentle, good, and caring to him even in small things. I noticed that he also reciprocates kindness to me by doing out-of-the-ordinary tasks like turning the fan on when he thought that I was still sleeping, preparing food, etc. These are blessings but I know Jesus is also teaching me to be good and kind to him even if it is difficult to do.
My Dgroup leader,and the rest of our discipleship group, also helped me to continuously grow in this area. Through accountability, they advised me to show them respect by adding “po” and “opo” which at first is very hard for me to mention. I stopped shouting and talking back at him. I chose to be understanding and patient to him whenever he is lost his temper. Later on, I would talk to him about why he got mad. I now honor his advices to me. I can now freely say my thoughts about him without offending him.
The Lord is also teaching me to be good and kind to others. In this way, I participate in some outreach programs of other DGroups. I was blessed with an experience to teach the Bible and share school supplies for the kids in Moonwalk, Las Piñas last May 15. It is a privilege to be used by the Lord. It is really Him Who works in the believer’s heart to show goodness and kindness to others. It is only the Holy Spirit that I am able to have these traits and continuously walk different.
Romans 22:9 says, “Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good”. It reminded me that being good and kind is not just offering help on behalf of others, but mainly manifests in the uprightness of heart and life. Through God’s goodness and kindness in my life, I do my best to be sincere with love to others every day of my life.
To God be all the Glory!